Example of Band 7 (Academic Task 1)
The graphs above give information about fast food consumption in a European country.
Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
You should spend about 20 minutes on this task.
Write at least 150 words.
Band 7 Answer (See below for the examiner's reasons why this is a Band 7)
The bar chart describes the expenditure per person per week spent on fast foods in UK while the line graph illustrates the trends in consumption of that from 1997 to 1990.
As can be seen from the bar chart, expenditure on fast foods is broken down into 3 income groups—high income, average income and low income. In the high income groups, expenditure spent on hamburgers accounts for the biggest amount, reaching at just over 40 pence per person per week; while that spent on fish and chips, and pizza are nearly the same which are 17 pence and 19 pence respectively. However, the amount of money spent on hamburgers in average income category falls, reaching at around 32 pence whereas consumptions for fish and chips increases to 25 and pizza has the lowest amount only occupies 11 pence. In contrast, for the low income groups, none of these three types, however, has consumption beyond 20—hamburgers (14), fish and chips (18), and pizza (8).
According to the line chart, the consumption of hamburgers saw a gradually increase from just under 100 to over 500 grams by 1990. Unlike the hamburger trend, consumption of fish and chips in general gradually fell, from 300 to 230 over the same period. In contract, pizza gradually increases gradually from 20 to 170 over the two decades, but consistently remains the least popular option.
Therefore, it is clear to see from the two graphs that the popularity of hamburgers increases greatly in general over the period, and seems to be most popular in particular with higher income people.
No. of words 271
· All parts of the prompts are pretty well addressed in general.
· There is a very clear position.
· We can see that there is good introduction here; concise and to the point. Also note how this done in one brief sentence
· This second sentence helps to give a good overview of the topic.
· There is a clear conclusion here and the writer has identified summarised the main points of the task in a clean and tidy way
· The main elements of the data are extended and supported well.
Coherence and cohesion
· Information and ideas are logically organised and there is a clear progression throughout the response
· Referencing and substitution are used flexibly. For example, the writer switches between using ‘expenditure,’ ‘money spent’ and consumption of’ to describe the data. In order to raise this to Band 8 the writer could have substituted ‘high income group’ for ‘most affluent sector of society’ or something similar.
· Each paragraph has a clear central topic which is developed. If you look at each paragraph you can almost summarise each one with a single sentence. This is a good way to practice building your own sentences.
· The sequencing of sentences within paragraphs is logical and well organised.
· There is quite a wide range of connective elements between and within sentences, often used to make comparisons, like; in contrast, unlike, therefore, however. And these are generally used accurately and effectively.
Lexical Resource (vocab)
· The resource is sufficient to allow some flexibility and precision. There is a wide range of vocabulary which prevents the writing from becoming boring.
· Vocab is used effectively, even the more complicated elements, and when mistakes are made they don’t affect understanding.
· Referencing and substitution is used effectively.
· More complex vocabulary would raise this to Level 8.
Grammar Range and Accuracy
· There is quite a wide range of structures and sentences used here. Both past and present tenses are used accurately. The writer is clearly very comfortable using tenses. There are both complex and simple sentences mixed together, and subordinate clauses are managed well. For example, the final sentence is quite a complex structure and is accurately used.
· Grammar and punctuation are generally well controlled and error-free sentences are frequent.
· A few minor errors prevent this reaching Level 8. E.g: ‘pizza gradually increases gradually’; ‘In contract’ instead of ‘In contrast’; 'consumptions for fish and chips.'